LISTENING
No oral communication can be effective without proper listening on the part of the receiver of the message. It has been found by authorities on the subject that generally people retain only about one-fourth of what they hear after two days. In this way, listening becomes the weakest link in oral communication.
It is, therefore, very important to improve the ability of the listener to absorb what he is being told. It is largely a matter of mental conditioning. We will listen carefully only if we want to listen. Most people become lazy and listening requires serious work. We have to train ourselves to listen attentively. With an alert mind, we have to learn to pay attention to spoken words. The best guidance in this regard is contained in the following.
Ten commandments of Listening' as formulated by Keith Davis and John W. Newstrom:
Stop talking:
Unfortunately, most of us are more prone to talking than listening. Generally, we are more interested in what we want to say than in what we are being told. So we must stop talking before we listen.
Put the talker at ease:
If the speaker/talker is not at ease he will not be able to do his job satisfactorily. So it is very important for the listener/listeners to make the talker comfortable.
Show the talker that you want to listen:
The talker must be given to understand that the listener/listeners are eager to listen. Hence it is important not to distract the talker by looking at your watch, reading some book or newspaper or looking away from him. Moreover, you should give the talker the impression that you are listening to him to understand rather than to oppose.
Remove distractions:
Certain activities like tapping with a pen or pencil, shuffling papers or passing something along distract the talker.
Empathize with the talker:
True exchange of information can take place only if we place ourselves in the position of the talker. This way we will be able to appreciate his point of view and build up a climate conducive to communication.
Be patient:
Patience pays. This saying holds good in every situation. We should give enough time for the talker. There are all kinds of talkers. Some get to the point very quickly while some take a lot more time. So we must give the talker enough time to come to his point in his own way. We must not be tempted to interrupt.
Hold your temper:
Anger is the worst enemy of communication as it builds walls among the participants in the communication event. It hardens their positions and blocks their minds to others' words.
Go easy on argument and criticism:
As Dale Carnegie has very succinctly said, you cannot win an argument. Argument and criticism do not lead anywhere. On the other hand, argument and criticism put the talker on the defensive and make him angry.
ASK questions:
Putting questions shows an open mind. It shows that you are listening. It shows that you are getting the message and also giving feedback.
Stop talking:
This is the last as well as the first commandment. All other commandments or rules of listening depend on it.
This way we see that we can improve our listening only through conscious effort.
THE PROCESS OF LISTENING
Listening is an integrated process, which consists of the following phases: undivided attention, hearing. understanding, interpreting, evaluating, empathizing and conceptualizing. An explanation of these aspects of the process of listening would be helpful before proceeding. These phases do not occur in succession but instead operate concurrently and in tandem. All aspects of oral verbal communication require one to focus on what is being said, understand it, and register it as part of one's body of knowledge and experience.
Undivided attention:
Effective listening requires a certain frame of mind. The process of listening is rooted in attentively hearing the message. Undivided attention admits no distractions and no intrusive thoughts or ideas that are unrelated to the message To concentrate on what is being said, an earnest listener would focus on the message and not let other things compete for his or her attention. The listener in this phase discriminates between thoughts, ideas, or images that belong in his or her focus of attention and those that float on its margin and must be kept from entering into conscious consideration.
Hearing:
Listening involves hearing distinct sounds and perceiving fine modulations in tone. The receiver recognizes the shape of words and intonation patterns. Familiarity with the sound of words and the spoken rhythm of speech contributes to the attentiveness of the listener. Pitch, voice modulations, and the quality of sound are equally important for hearing with the right attention.
Understanding:
A listener can hear words but must listen to know their intended meaning. Perfect communication is when the full meaning of what is said has been understood. This includes words, tone, and body talk. A good listener hears words, observes body movements, gestures, facial expressions, and eye movements, and notices variations in tone and pitch of voice. If the listener attends only to words without paying close attention to how they are said, he or she may be missing the real, intended meaning of those words.
Interpreting:
Understanding and interpretation follow the phase of the hearing. The listener attempts to comprehend what is heard. Understanding the language may not be enough for fully comprehending the message and successfully participating in the act of communication. It should be accompanied by the ability to interpret what is communicated, which occurs when the listener takes account of his or her own knowledge and experience.
Evaluating:
Communication requires that the listener have the critical ability to see for himself or herself the value of what is being discussed or heard. It is only then that the listener can closely follow the argument. The evaluation of content is closely related to the listener's own interest in what is being communicated.
Empathizing:
A sympathetic listener sees the speaker's point of view. He or she may not agree with what is said, yet such a listener allows the other person to say what he or she wants to say.
Conceptualizing:
Conceptualization occurs when the listener finally assimilates what has been heard in the context of his or her own knowledge and experiences. That is why listening is not only important but also indispensable for perfect communication.
References-
Chaturvedi, Piyush Dhar. Business communication: Concepts, cases, and applications. Pearson Education India, 2011.
Sinha, K. K.. Business Communication. India, Na, 2000.
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